When it comes to self-compassion, there are two different parts to it. One is yin self-compassion, and it consists of being kind and gentle with yourself. This is very important because we often tend to be really hard on ourselves, and yin self-compassion can help counteract that. The other part is yang self-compassion, and this consists of strong and assertive with yourself. Sometimes we need to push ourselves a little bit in order to grow and improve. Yang self-compassion can help us do that while still being kind and supportive to ourselves.
It's really important to be aware of both yin and yang self-compassion so that you can apply them to your own life as needed. Sometimes you'll need more yin self-compassion, and sometimes you'll need more yang self-compassion. It's all about finding the right balance for you and knowing when to exercise each one. Many exercises that teach self-compassion can help you be more gentle and nurturing with yourself (the yin part), which is a great start if it's something you haven't practiced before...but once you have mastered it, or get better at it, you can also start exploring and building up your yang self-compassion!
"Self-compassion can be considered to have two parts: the feminine and the masculine. In traditional Chinese philosophy, this duality is represented by yin and yang (Neff & Germer, 2018). The three core components of self-compassion according to Neff’s theoretical model (Neff, 2016) are self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness of suffering. In terms of yin self-compassion, self-kindness involves soothing and comforting oneself when suffering, common humanity involves recognizing that pain is an inevitable part of being human, and mindfulness involves being aware of and open to one’s pain and suffering in the moment. Approaching pain and suffering in this yin way allows one to begin to transform and heal. An example of yin self-compassion for a woman who is experiencing burnout at work would be drawing a hot bath and playing relaxing music at the end of the working day.
In yang self-compassion, also known as fierce self-compassion, self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness manifest as stepping up and protecting oneself, standing with others who have experienced similar disharmony, and in clearly seeing the truth. In this way, yang self-compassion shows up as fierce, inner strength (Neff & Germer, 2018). An example of yang self-compassion for the woman experiencing burnout at work would be speaking up to her boss about taking some time off or cutting down her current workload."
The idea is to build and strengthen your yang self-compassion, (aka fierce self-compassion), while still practicing yin self-compassion, (aka gentle self-compassion).
Credit: This tool was adapted from the Mindful Self-compassion Workbook by Kristin Neff and Chris Germer (2018) by Hugo Alberts (PhD) and Lucinda Poole (PsyD)
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